I’m so happy to be fully entrenched in the Qi of Spring- the Qi of fresh starts, renewal, movement, and growth.
Part of my ritual for celebrating the equinox is taking a personal inventory to notice where I’m in balance/ in alignment with my values and where I’m out of balance/alignment. Today I noticed some old patterns had crept back: judgement, concern about what others think, and feeling “never enough.” I caught myself thinking…why is this coming back up…I’ve done this work!
Taking a deep breath I remind myself, yes I’ve done this work- so I know what I need to do right now. I look through old notes from the books that have been the most impactful in helping me get to a place of peace, relief, and being comfortable in my own skin: Brene Brown’s wholehearted living, Debbie Ford’s shadow work.
I remember that the way through feelings of “ I’m never enough” is to generate courage, compassion, and connection; and a component necessary to generate all of those things is non-judgment. To be courageous you have to Feel It And Do It Anyway, you can’t get caught up in judgment. Likewise, crucial to the energy of connection (with myself, others, spirit) is being able to have a non-judgemental exchange. Also, when I practice compassion, the uncomfortable art of sitting with my own or other’s pain, I must be non-judgemental (in fact, one way to avoid the discomfort of compassion practice is by being judgemental- in my case, the feeling of “I’m not enough” leads to pain, and I avoid engaging with that pain by judging myself, which leads to more feelings of “I’m not enough”, more pain, more judgement).
So, this Spring Equinox I am building a healthier relationship with judgement. I do this through Shadow Work: owning it as an aspect of myself and looking for the gifts in it. I do this by noticing the thoughts in my head that can run on autopilot and actively working to halt them in their tracks then replace them with a thought more aligned to my values (example: I notice myself judging. Out loud, I say “Judging.” Then I invite myself to instead observe and get curious).
How are you observing the Spring Equinox? What are your rituals or traditions? Anything that you are calling in or releasing?